I’m in a very different season of my life than I’ve ever been. I’m officially referring to it as The Spiritual Drought of 2017. I haven’t been a Christian for very long, and I would call this season my first real spiritual trial. It started when my daughter was born in January of 2016 – I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and things haven’t been the same since.
I would say this season intensified just a few months ago following a conversation with my best friend about the act of lamenting. She read some of the psalms of lament to me and it opened the flood gates. I began questioning everything. All situations basically begged the question “why?” from me.
Why is God allowing this?
Why doesn’t God fix this?
Lots of questions that don’t have answers and never will until we get to heaven.
Many other questions more specific to certain situations are constantly racing through my mind. I am often doubtful if God actually knows what He’s doing up there. Or if He is even truly present, for that matter.
I feel as though He has left me. I find myself searching, wandering, and seeking to no avail. When I close my eyes during a quiet moment, His absence is almost deafening.
At this point, you’re probably like, “Ummm, where is this going?! How does this pertain to being thankful for the Bible?”
I’m thankful for the Bible because it reveals all of my aforementioned thoughts as lies.
The Bible is the true, inerrant Word of God and, without this foundational belief, I would be so lost and confused during this season of life. I can flip open a book and find comfort and solace in absolute truth.
Because of the Bible, I’m able to discern and sort through my emotions. The book of Jeremiah tells us that the heart is deceitful. I think most of humankind would agree that the heart is where our emotions stem from, right? Logic and reason then leads me to believe that if the heart is deceitful then the emotions that come from it can be too.
Here’s two verses that help me navigate my emotions during this time in my life.
I can rest assured that God has not forsaken me because of this verse. When I compare my feeling of being forsaken to this verse, I can easily tell which one is the lie. God does not promise that we will escape suffering or loss, but that He will never leave us, no matter what we face.
I find comfort in this verse because it assures me that all the other verses, including the one above, will never be wrong. God is immutable. In other words He is: steadfast, enduring, unchangeable, constant, unvarying, established.
Lastly, I would like to finish by clarifying that I spent a lot of time wondering why God is allowing me to feel this way. Why do I feel like You’re absent? I’ve prayed and prayed and prayed for Him to remove that feeling from me. Fortunately, I’m at a point in my faith where I understand that if God doesn’t remove me from a particular situation or circumstance, then it’s because He wants me to learn something or grow from it in some way. I may never know why in this lifetime, but I know this trial will serve a purpose. And I find comfort in that too.
Question of the Day:
What is your favorite Bible verse and why?